Sunday, February 23, 2020

Letter: to all those who think I write for them

Dear whoever thinks this is for them because there are so many who think every word I write is for them, so sure, take the credit for this one. I am allowing you to.

May you never think of me again and find solace in your life for it can’t be so as long as I exist and my blog does too because you just can’t help looking, taking a peek into what I am thinking, can you?

May you start prioritizing yourself, much like I do and every time I choose ‘Me’ over everything, you can say ‘Me too.’

May you understand how hard it is to be friends, non-friends, more than friends, anything but friends, friends with benefits and not always the kind of benefits you want, buddy, lover, stalker, admirer, reader, acquaintance, stranger with me and choose never to go through that hardship in your life.

May you wake up afresh and with a new perspective on life.

May you never ask me to choose between who I am and who I should be because I won’t be making the decision but you will be suffering the consequences for presenting the choices.

May you live long and prosper and find another heart to fill the hole of the one that was once there and might not be anymore since I seem to keep walking away with it like I own your arteries and the tar that flows within.

May you forget the touch of my fingers holding on to yours or the way I sound when I laugh freely, madly, uncontrollably or cry shyly, hiding, unabiding to the rules of how a girl should sob.

May you seek and find the answers that keep you awake at night and may you write and write every word that doesn’t brush past my essence.

As for me, I’m right here.  I’ve always been right here.  I will always be right here, behind a screen, writing another letter that won’t get to the person its meant for.

Meanwhile, you can assume.

This is for you. 

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